How to Get the Better of Best Buy

by a corporate sucka' no longa'

Having read all of the information in 2600 concerning the phone systems in Kmart I have decided to share some information about Best Buy's phone system/procedures.  I was employed at Best Buy until recently when I became so sick of my job that I just had to quit.

All Best Buys share an extremely similar floor plan - they all shoot to match the default one.  All Best Buys have a CD area with two answer centers.  One is in the middle of the CDs (this one has two phones, usually one cordless) and the other is in the back of the CD area and has the store CD player in it.  This back answer center has a sliding door that can simply be slid over to access the store radio.  If one felt like it he or she could simply crank the level of sound to an unbearable amount with the flick of a wrist.

The front answer center (in the middle of the CDs) is the best place to find fun stuff to try.  This center is probably only attended half of the time.  If you get a hold of the cordless phone from this center or have another way of getting a line, these are the best of the extensions:

75  - Pressing this will cut off any pages in progress.  Anyone (including managers) who is making a page will be cut off.

60  - This is the best extension.  This is the page extension.  If you get this far you can say anything you want to everyone in the store.  It's a very loud paging system and could be used to spread vulgarity.

90, 91, 92   - Access to the outside lines (one can call out through these extensions).  Long distance calls are not allowed.

The Muze Machine

Muze is a piece of shit.  It is simply a program being run on a weak little i486 inside the station.  The computer has simple system files that load the Muze program when the computer is booting.  If one opens the front of the Muze (the latch is on the front panel in the bottom-right corner [it's not locked either]) one could simply stick a disk in the i486 with a nasty boot virus.  Or one could get to the DOS prompt after resetting to browse/do whatever with the Muze/system files.

Best Buy Security Info

The person at the front of the store who controls the cameras is called the LP.

The LP is sooo weak.  If an LP believes that you have something that you have not paid for, he/she cannot stop you unless you have been recorded taking product.  LPs are easily tricked.

Code Translations

If someone says "Code 99" over the page system it means the LP has recorded someone pocketing product that has not been paid for.  In other words, if you just grabbed a CD, put it back.

"Code 5" means someone wants to be clocked out manually because the time clock needs to be overridden by a manager (happens if employees stay past scheduled time).

"Code 20 to XYZ" means that a customer needs assistance in XYZ.

There is one last thing people should know about Best Buy.  They produce a shitload of waste.  There is an unimaginable amount of cardboard boxes that bring in the CDs, videos, software, etc.  Best Buy doesn't recycle this cardboard - and it wastes an unbelievable amount.  The only thing Best Buy reuses (as far as I know) are the plastic boxes that bring the magazines.  They only do this because it saves money.  I found out that Best Buy is like almost every other major corporation that sells product to the consumer - they do anything to save a dollar.

The final thing I would like to say about Best Buy is that they make almost all of their profits in accessories (you know, those cheap-ass CD holders they sell for 30 dollars?) and PSPs.  Performance Service Plans are the insurance plans they sell on equipment that almost always already comes with a 90-day warranty.  Without the PSP, Best Buy would not be.