An Atavistic Freak Out, Final Chapter

by Leon Manna

The following story is a work of fiction.

When they arrested us, I had dyed half of my hair light brown.

"Your honor, I'd like to begin with the fact that a recent malfunction in the FBI offices of the witness we will be having sworn in, Segev Bezalel -"

"You pronounced his name wrong, it's Bitch."  This came from the defendant's table, and then a fake cough.  The witness snickered from across the room.The judge yelled at me to shut up or I would be held in contempt of court.

Lenny continued.  "Segev Bezalel, whose evidence room caught on fire due to a malfunction in the thermostat, has been unable to produce any evidence so far tying my client or I to any of the charges that are currently levied against us."

Some guy from the district attorney's office shouted that he objected for the millionth time that day, and his motion was not sustained, although quite a few were.  They ended up calling Moe to the stand to testify.  The prosecutor asked him about the intrusion that corrupted all of the computers and servers in his office.

"Yes, somebody installed malware on all servers and computers in my office."

"And who do you think did it?"

"Leon Manna."

"How do you know?"

"A combination of the childish message and Leon's real capabilities to do such a thing.  The planning was characteristic of Leon's previous plots, such as Sawtooth."

"Sawtooth, where he was seen doing fraud in person?"

F*ck.

"Yes, exactly."

F*ck, again.

He asked a few more questions.  Soon after, Lenny went in on him.  "Tell me, Mr. Bezalel, about the IP address that was associated with this attack?"  He had a look on his face like he was planning something.

"It was some kind of uh... proxy."  He stuttered!  Sweet-mother-of-God, here it comes!

"And where, exactly, was this proxy located?"

After a brief pause, he said, "Turkey."

"Were you able to get jurisdiction in Turkey and subpoena this server?"

"No."

"Then how can you be so sure this was tied to me and my client?"

"It was timed with your planned escape."

"Did the exact same attack not happen in multiple other locations nationwide?  How can you be so sure that this wasn't some act of planned terror by a greater force and not some vagrant who wanders across the country?  My client isn't capable of something that meticulous, at least not in that timeframe."  I made sure to do the same thing a bunch of times.  Everywhere.  A lot of places.  As many as I could.  I am God.  I am not an American terrorist.

"Well...  I mean...  Technically...  No."

"I heard Sawtooth was mentioned, how can you say for sure that it was my client?  How do you know?"

"We have CCTV footage of your client in the bank, as well as witnesses."  He did not sound confident.

"Have?  Or had."

"Have."

"Where is it?"

Segev glared at Lenny.  The judge told him to answer.

"We're working on that."

But Lenny continued.  "Sawtooth was robbed by a man named Joseph Erickson.  As far as we know, Joseph Erickson is dead.  And as for your evidence, it was destroyed in an act of terrorism, from an outside source, combined with a malfunction in the evidence room.  Was it not?"

Moe chuckled, and said, "It was."

"Is that the case?  Then how come Sawtooth was unable to recover the footage from their own system?"

"That information is classified.  We don't have to tell you.  We're not going to tell you.  Leon knows, why don't you ask him?"

Lenny paused, and gave him a strange look.  "You're aware perjury is a crime, right?"

Moe continued to give Lenny the death stare.

"I rest my case."

Then they brought in the bane of my f*cking existence, Khir, who got on the stand for 15 minutes but was ultimately unable to say for certain that I was the man he saw in the bank.  My disguise was so half-assed, but despite what I thought, worked.  Thank you, uh...  What was his f*cking name... Joseph Erickson!  Thank you!

Liz denied sitting next to me on the stand due to the fact that there was now no CCTV footage and nobody was present in the room when she uh... didn't do this and the prosecution was unable to get anything useful out of her.

They pulled the clerk from the car rental place up.  She said she couldn't identify me (I'm a shapeshifter) even though she definitely could, did not feel like ratting me out, and was willing to lie under oath for me.  I smiled at her.  She smiled back.  I didn't technically go in there.  Somehow she seemed prettier than before.  From across the courtroom, she looked like an angel.

They were unable to get in contact with Aryana.  Probably for the best.  Hope she's okay, though I heard she still hates me.  I think she moved to Europe and found a nice French boy.  John Capper refused to testify for obvious reasons.  He was arrested on a failure to appear warrant, and was sentenced to 15 years for murder when they tied him to the crime.  I think I disabled the script on their server while I was blacked out on bromazepam.  I don't remember.  May went missing and is presumed to be dead, which totally happened and is 100 percent true.  She has them fooled though.  I think she's a contract killer now, or some shit like that.  Unconfirmed reports, but I know it was her.  A woman matching her description was seen with several men who later died of cyanide poisoning.  Goldstein also did not testify; he was busy testifying for a different case.  I think they understood the nature of, well, Goldstein, and gave him a pass on that.  Pierre moved to Ireland.  Quite often I like to imagine he's still out there somewhere, riding out on the water.  Right now he is a fugitive.  Ireland did not extradite him, if they ever even found out that the fake identity I set up for him there was a fake identity.

The only charges we couldn't beat were the drug possession charges.  A couple misdemeanors, one felony.  I spent ten days in a state hospital for an evaluation before they released me on probation, under the conditions that I participate in an intensive outpatient program and if I fail drug tests or f*ck up at the IOP, they will send me to jail or a mental hospital.  Again.  Mountain View State Forensic Hospital.  There were people in there who hadn't seen the sun in years.

I got a call from Segev when I got out.

"You tryna smoke?"

I said yeah.  Even an FBI agent can break the rules.

And in the end, I learned nothing.  There doesn't seem to be some kind of moral to the story here.  I just couldn't figure it out.  I was so close.  By only a hair, they got me.  But that hair was just in reach...  What if I had done it right?  What if I had gotten away to Cuba?  What if I hadn't mistreated my ex-girlfriend?  Then it hit me like a bolt of lightning.

Hah hah hah.

What if I did it all again?  I sat in my apartment for a moment, thinking.  Then, in the blink of an eye, my new name is Lee Williams.  Lee Williams was born into this earth through a Ring Zero rootkit I installed on an SSA machine a lifetime ago, just like Leon was all those years back, and he was a new man, born again, for a second trial.  A fallen angel, if you will.  Which you won't.

Then, I reached into my drawer, pulled out a check, and the outworn chase of money continued.

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