When the fight  started!
  
     
     
   When  I got home last night my wife demanded I take her  somewhere expensive.....so I took her to the gas  station.....and  that's when the fight started!

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After retiring, I  went to the social security office to apply for Social  Security, The woman behind the counter asked for my  driver's license to verify my age. I looked for my  wallet but realized I'd left it at home. I said that I  was sorry and that I would have to go home and come  back later. The woman said, "unbutton your shirt". So  I unbuttoned my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.  She said, "that silver hair on your chest is proof  enough for me'' and she processed my Social Security  application. When I got home I excitedly told my wife  about my experience. She said, "you should have  dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability,  too". And that's when the fight  started!

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My wife and I  were sitting at a table at my high school reunion and  I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as  she sat alone at her table. My wife asked, "Do you  know her?'' Yes I sighed. She's my old girlfriend. I  understand she took up drinking after we broke up  those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober  since."
"My God! " says  my wife, "Who would think a person could go on  celebrating that long!" And that's when  the fight started!

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I rear ended a  car this morning. So, there we are along side the road  and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You  know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed that  little things just seem extra funny to you. Yea, well  I couldn't believe it...he was a DWARF!! He stormed  over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted....I am  NOT HAPPY!!! So, I looked down at him and said, "  Well, which one ARE you?" And that's  when the fight  started!