John
Gerhardt
>
>
STUPID
INSTRUCTIONS :-)
>
>
> > In case you needed further proof that the human race
>
> is doomed through
> > stupidity, here are some actual label
instructions on
> > consumer goods.
> >
> >
On a Sears hairdryer --
> > Do not use while sleeping.
>
> (Damn, and that's the only time I have to work on my
> >
hair).
> >
> > On a bag of Fritos --
> > You could be
a winner! No purchase necessary. Details
> > inside.
> > (the
shoplifter special?)
> >
> > On a bar of Dial soap --
>
> "Directions: Use like regular soap."
> > (and that would be
how???....)
> >
> > On some Swanson frozen dinners --
>
> "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
> > (but, it's "just" a
suggestion).
> >
> > On Tesco's Tiram! isu dessert (printed on
bottom) - "Do
> > not turn upside down."
> > (well...duh, a
bit late, huh!)
> >
> > On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding
--
> > "Product will be hot after heating."
> > (...and you
thought????...)
> >
> > On packaging for a Rowenta iron
--
> > "Do not iron clothes on body."
> > (but wouldn't this
save me more time)?
> >
> > On Boot's Children Cough Medicine
--
> > "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking
>
> this medication."
> > (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of
construction
> > accidents if we could
> > just get those
5-year-olds with head-colds off those
> > forklifts.)
>
>
> > On Nytol Sleep Aid --
> > "Warning: May cause
drowsiness."
> > (and...I'm taking this because???....)
>
>
> > On most brands of Christmas lights --
> > "For indoor
or outdoor use only."
> > (as opposed to...what)?
> >
>
> On a Japanese food processor --
> > "Not to be used for the other
use."
> > (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit
>
> curious.)
> >
> > On Sainsbury's peanuts --
> >
"Warning: contains nuts."
> > (talk about a news flash)
>
>
> > On an American Airlines packet of nuts --
> >
"Instructions: Open packet, eat
> > nuts."
> > (Step 3: maybe,
uh...fly Delta? DUH!)
> >
> > On a child's Superman costume
--
> > "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
>
> (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for
> > this
one.)
> >
> > On a Swedish Chain Saw --
> > "Do not
attempt to stop chain with your hands or
> > genitals." WHEW!! I sure
hope not. GOD AWFUL!
! > > (Oh my God...was there a lot of this
happening
> > somewhere?)
> >
> >
>
:-)
>
>
>