"Bill Gates is just a monocle and a persian cat away from being a villian
in a James Bond movie."		- unknown

"The obvious mathematical breakthrough [to break modern encryption]
 would be development of an easy way to factor large prime numbers."
 - Bill Gates from "The Road Ahead," p. 265, demonstrating he might not
   be as clever as we think he is.

   [The submitter notes: For the non-mathematicians: a number is called
   "prime" if and only if it can _not_ be factored, because it is only
   divisible by 1 and itself.]


"The day Microsoft makes something that doesn't suck, 
is probably the day Microsoft starts making vacuum cleaners."
        - Ernst Jan Plugge

If Bill Gates had a dime for every time a Windows box crashed...
.... Oh, wait a minute, he already does.
cbbrowne@hex.net -  

Windows NT to extend reach update: Microsoft wants customized versions
of Windows NT for "embedded" systems such as health and communications
equipment.

Gives Blue Screen of Death a whole new meaning...


Don't follow my instructions.
-- Paul Leach 

I'm really sorry for the bad advice.
-- Paul Leach 

If things go badly, just put them back.  They're in \windows\system.
-- Paul Leach 

Well, I have to mea culpa again.
-- Paul Leach 

I misunderstood the information I was given.
-- Paul Leach 

I could make a 486/33 look like a Cray...
-- NT Security mailing list

Not an exploit.  You bypassed the system entirely 
via direct physical access. That doesn't count.
-- Paul Leach 

If you apply the non-128 version, you won't 
be 128 bit anymore, if I recall correctly.
-- Paul Leach 

Each day I receive about 50 messages from this 
list about the moral implications of port scanning.
-- Pete Morton, NT Security mailing list

One of these days, we'll have to have you out behind 
the woodshed for being such a rabble-rouser.
-- Paul Leach 

I don't know.
-- Paul Leach 

Let me apologize -- I was a little too terse in my response.
-- Paul Leach 

I don't mind people bashing me and MS for what we do wrong.
-- Paul Leach 

If it's a service then go to the service manager, select the service in
question, select startup, then enable interact with the desktop.
-- Michael Howard 

It's just a rumor.
-- Paul Leach 

I personaly think that UNIX being unfriendly 
is a myth spread by Microsoft.
-- Lewis E. Wolfgang 

It is ironic that, if we had not made networking, TCP, and a standard API
to use them as an integral part of the OS, the Web might not be
ubiquitous, because the ability to get on the web would be beyond the
powers of most users, who would have to acquire and integrate all those
things themselves.
-- Paul Leach 

The worst part is: you can tell that they really believe it, that
something isn't real/hasn't been invented until someone in Redmond
implements it.
-- NT Security mailing list

I apologize for using the list's bandwidth.
-- Paul Leach 
NT Security mailing list

So you wanted to get access to the Internet. You called up an ISP, 
they sent you a pile of diskettes via snail-mail, you installed them. 
Takes about a week.
-- Paul Leach 

It's time for me to apologize.
-- Eric Fitzgerald 

I apologize for distributing incorrect information.
-- Eric Fitzgerald 

MS-DOS is relatively screwed up to begin with, 
and has few to no redeeming qualities.
-- NT Security mailing list

Yeah -- we love staying up all night providing patches that close off 
each port, one by one, as smart crackers change which port they hit.
-- Paul Leach 

You know what they say about the PR, 
there's no such thing as bad publicity.
-- Paul Leach 

That isn't how we're fixing it.
-- Paul Leach 

You may accuse us of incompetence if you like.
-- Paul Leach 

We can't seem to stop the DoS attacks.
-- Paul Leach 

We deliberately and cynically make the smallest 
band-aid fixes we can, just enough to convince 
customers that the problem is fixed when it really isn't.
-- Paul Leach 

That just isn't true.
-- Paul Leach 

If it is incompetence, then it isn't just confined to us.
-- Paul Leach 

Hmm, well we're hoping that once we get our COFFEE protocol running,
we'll be able to control all the coffee makers in the world.
-- Josh Cohen 

We know what's best for you anyway.
-- Josh Cohen 

Dont assume that I'm an NT supporter.
-- Josh Cohen 

I'm a die hard Unix geek.
-- Josh Cohen 

My own personal goal for NT is for it to be 
more interoperable with open systems like Unix.
-- Josh Cohen 

This is the first I've heard that 
anyone felt that that was inadequate.
-- Paul Leach 

You don't know what you are talking about.
-- Paul Leach 

We will be issuing a hot-fix...
-- Paul Leach 

I understand your gripe.
-- Paul Leach 

It's true we haven't done anything yet for 
Windows 95, but we have done a lot for Windows NT.
-- Paul Leach 

I caught our network printer one night 
last week trying to surf the web!
--  Peter Unk, NT sysadmin

Be a hero and point out how stupid MS is 
for believing that obscurity equals security.
-- Paul Leach 

It is always running after I reboot.
-- Paul Leach 

Have you reported it to secure@microsoft.com?
-- Paul Leach 


              In Its Own Words
              Microsoft makes the case against itself

              "It seems clear that it will be very hard to increase
              market share on the merits of Internet Explorer 4 alone.
              It will be more important to leverage the Operating
              System asset to make people use IE instead of
              Navigatior."

                      -- Microsoft's Christian Wildfeuer, Feb 24 1997

                ----------------------------------------------------

              "I was quite frank with him (Scott Cook, CEO of Intuit)
              that if he had a favor we could do for him that would
              cost us something like $1m to do that in return for
              switching browsers in the next few months I would be
              open to doing that."

                                  -- Bill Gates, e-mail, July 24 1996

                ----------------------------------------------------

              "(Computer manufacturers) want to remove the (IE) icon
              from the desktop ... this is not allowed."

                             -- Microsoft executive Chris Jones, 1995

                ----------------------------------------------------

              "Memphis (Windows 98 code name) is a key weapon in the
              IE share battle."

                                    -- Microsoft executive Brad Chase

                ----------------------------------------------------

              "I am convinced we have to use Windows
              -- this is the one thing they (Netscape) don't have ...
              (Windows 98) must be killer on OEM shipments so that
              Netscape never gets a chance on these systems."

               -- Microsoft Senior Vice President Jim Allchin, January
                                                               2 1997

                ----------------------------------------------------

              "Netscape pollution must be eradicated."

                              -- Microsoft Vice-President Jeff Raikes

                ----------------------------------------------------

              "I thought our #1 strategic imperative was to get IE
              share. Our best hope is tying tight to Windows... that
              is, unless I've woken up in an alternate state and now
              work for Netscape."

                                -- Megan Bliss, e-mail, March 25 1997

                ----------------------------------------------------

              "We should move the sign-up Wizard into the boot-up
              sequence somewhere ... this way we can increase the
              likelihood that an end user gets the option to sign up
              for solutions that promote IE before they get into the
              desktop or any customized shell that features other
              browser solutions."

               -- Microsoft senior executive Brad Chase, e-mail, March
                                                               1 1996

                ----------------------------------------------------

              "Look at why people who get IE with a new machine switch
              to Navigator and what is being addressed in IE 4.0 to
              make that difficult."

              --Microsoft executive Jonathan Roberts, e-mail, March 28
                                                                 1997

                ----------------------------------------------------

              "It is a mistake to release (Windows 98) without
              bundling IE with it."

                                        -- Kumar Mehta, March 27 1997

                ----------------------------------------------------

              "Internet Explorer will be distributed every way we can
              ... bundled with Windows 95 upgrade and included by
              OEMs."


                                        -- Bill Gates, January 5 1996

                ----------------------------------------------------

              "Browser share is job 1 at this company."

              -- Microsoft General Manager Carl Stork, September 1996