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View Full Version : Dogs and Cat Passe' In China. Penis, It's What's For Dinner.


Joe_J.
February 18th, 2006, 11:50 PM
On the menu today: horse penis and testicles with a chilli dip
By Richard Spencer in Beijing
(Filed: 17/02/2006)

The menu at Beijing's latest venue for its growing army of gourmets is eye-watering rather than mouth-watering.

China's cuisine is renowned for being "in your face" - from the skinned dogs displayed at food markets to the kebabbed scorpions sold on street stalls - and there is no polite way of describing Guo-li-zhuang.

The waitress presents a dish combining the male organs of the ox and snake
A dish combining the male organs of an ox and a snake

Situated in an elegantly restored house beside Beijing's West Lake, it is China's first speciality penis restaurant.

Here, businessmen and government officials can sample the organs of yaks, donkeys, oxen and even seals. In fact, they have to, since they form part of every dish - except for those containing testicles.

"This is my third visit," said one customer, Liu Qiang. "Of course, there are other restaurants that serve the bian of individual animals. But this is the first that brings them all together."

Guolizhuang's owner, who set it up in November, is proud to combine his own surname (Guo), his wife's (Li) and his son's nickname (Zhuang) into its title.

A booking comes with a trained waitress and a nutritionist in attendance, to explain the menu and to boast its medicinal virtues.

A dog's penis, garnished with a plum
Dog's penis, garnished with a plum

In China, you are what you eat, and The Daily Telegraph's nutritionist, Zhu Yan, said the clients were mainly men eager to improve their yang, or virility. Women could benefit, too, she added, although she told the Telegraph's female photographer: "I wouldn't recommend the testicles. The testosterone might interfere in fertility. But many women say bian is good for the skin."

Some dishes appear unexceptional, such as the simple goat penis, sliced, dipped in flour, fried, and served skewered with soy sauce.

But Guolizhuang also has its showpieces, such as the elegantly named "Head crowned with a Jade Bracelet" (provided by horses from the western Muslim region of Xin-jiang), for £20 a portion, or "Dragon in the Flame of Desire" (yak, steamed whole, fried and flambéed) for £35.

For beginners, Miss Zhu recommended the hotpot, which offers a sampling of what the restaurant has to offer - six types of penis, and four of testicle, boiled in chicken stock by the waitress, Liu Yunyang, 22.

The Russian dog was first. It was julienned, and rather gamey.

The ox was, of all six, the most recognisable for what it was, even though it had been diced. In texture seemed identical to gristle.

The deer and the Mongolian goat were surprisingly similar: a little stringy, they had the appearance and feel of overcooked squid tentacles. The Xinjiang horse and the donkey, on the other hand, were quite different. Though both came sliced lengthwise, and looked like bacon, the horse was light and fatty, while the donkey had a firm colour and taste. The testicles were slightly crumbly, and tasted better with lashings of the sesame, soy and chilli dips thoughtfully provided.

One speciality, Canadian seal penis, costs a hefty £220, and requires ordering in advance. Miss Liu confessed that Guo-li-zhuang was an unusual place to work, partly because of her training - she has to recite tales proving the vigour of the animals in question as they are being eaten - and partly because of the interaction with the clientele. "I did find it embarrassing at first," she said. "And sometimes the customers take advantage of me by asking rude questions."

As for the supposed health benefits, Mr Liu, the most regular customer, was uncertain but hopeful. "I can't say I've noticed any difference yet," he said. "But it's a long-term thing."
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2006/02/17/wfood17.xml

Joe_J.
February 19th, 2006, 12:21 AM
Looks like they kept the dogs, just moved on to more "prime" cuts :cool:

This was originally on Hal Turner's site. The comments section on this is hilarious and recommended reading!

Anyone eating in a Chinese restaurant has got to be crazy.

brutus
February 19th, 2006, 02:20 AM
http://comedyspot.8m.com/images/chinese.jpg

SMG3000
February 19th, 2006, 04:40 AM
Aren't "Chinese" people actually the Mongols, or whatever that barbaric tribe was which swept over China hundreds or thousands of years ago? Effectively we aren't dealing with Chinese per se, but Mongols.
I'm not sure "Chinese" are fully human. How can we ever strike a balance with a people who eat dogs, cats, penises, and fetuses of their own people? The latter is considered a myth by some disbelievers, and I understand why they wish to believe so, but Chinese in China say it is true, socially accepted, though expensive. Black people and American Indians eating human flesh (the Donner party has been discovered not to have turned to cannabalism), and the Mongols consider repulsive, unbelievable things, to be delicacies. They are not fully human, end of story.

Frank Toliver
February 19th, 2006, 10:53 AM
Hey, see the opportunity here; imagine if we could convince them eating nigger would make them strong, tough, and hung like a horse.
800 million niggers /(1 billion chinese x 365 x 3 meals).

Problem solved!!

Joe_J.
February 19th, 2006, 11:32 AM
^^^ There's well more than a billion Chinese, CZ - but I think we can spare a few of our own niggers. Wouldn't want them to go hungry, you know. :D Then we can ship the mestizos over - course they'll have to eat two of those to get the nutritional benefit of one nigger :cool:

That could save the US economy, too, since the Chinese would develop a strong hankering for grape soda and barbeque potato chips.;)

Oy Ze Hate
February 19th, 2006, 01:36 PM
Hey, see the opportunity here; imagine if we could convince them eating nigger would make them strong, tough, and hung like a horse.
800 million niggers /(1 billion chinese x 365 x 3 meals).

Problem solved!!

Powerful insight.

Action Alert
February 19th, 2006, 01:50 PM
Hey, see the opportunity here; imagine if we could convince them eating nigger would make them strong, tough, and hung like a horse.
800 million niggers /(1 billion chinese x 365 x 3 meals).

Problem solved!!
HA HA HA! Very refreshing to see someone lighting a candle instead of cursing the darkness!:D

evilisgood
February 19th, 2006, 02:49 PM
On the menu today: horse penis and testicles with a chilli dip

Thanks, now I know what I ate the last time I got Fuk Yu Takee Outee.

Warlord
February 19th, 2006, 02:53 PM
Aren't "Chinese" people actually the Mongols, or whatever that barbaric tribe was which swept over China hundreds or thousands of years ago? Effectively we aren't dealing with Chinese per se, but Mongols.


No, the Chinese majority group are the Han. The Mongols under Ghengis Kahn conquered China about six hundred years ago. They were a tiny minority (like the Jews in the US today) and ended up intermarrying and disappearing (those Mongols who went to China to rule). The men each had a whole bunch of Chinese wives. Later on, Chinese dynasties took over.

The Warlord

JoeSixPack
February 19th, 2006, 02:58 PM
Supposedly, 8% of men in Asia have a Y-chromosome inherited directly from Genghis Khan.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Genghis_Khan

schutzenmeister
February 19th, 2006, 03:23 PM
HA HA HA! Very refreshing to see someone lighting a candle instead of cursing the darkness!:D


Right on! lol