View Full Version : I still love you Bob
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BOBBOBBOBBOBBOBBOBBOBBOBBOBBOBBOBBOBBOB
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[This message has been edited by Bongman (edited 03-30-2004).]
ilbastardoh
2004-03-30, 19:34
Take your stupid cult like religion and shove it up your ass with diahreah laden tissues. Then go drink affordable kool-aid(tm) immitation, cherry of course, and pour some amonia and dish detergent in there.
ps. Praise Bob
LostCause
2004-03-31, 04:29
Bob Dobbs lives.
Cheers,
Lost
Save yourselves pinks.
Slack. (http://www.totse.com/en/religion/subgenius/index.html)
I'm not sure that any of you are really getting any slack here, or something. It's all right here! Just click on the above link. Or send some money. Any old amount that's enough to cover postage. Or something that's cool enough to allow me to cover postage for you. Like a nice pen or if you send a postcard with a picture I like. I like landscapes mostly. Just send your money to:
Slack Industries
Unit 6827 - 367 Church St.
North Adams, MA 01247
Send now to get your very own slack, or something, or kill me.
BD w/ Kung-Fu Grip
2004-04-07, 08:33
" There are two types of people in this world, those who think there are two types of people, and the other kind.. but then, there is me"
J.R. "Bob" Dobbs at his mail fraud trial
You gotta admire the shameless for profit religions like The Subgenius. Do they still claim the world is going to end on July 5th, at 7:00 am, in 1997, or I mean 1998, or um 1999, ect?
Just remember to de-beak those prarie squid. Ouch!
It is apparent you have little slack. I suggest seeing a quack. Do the salute several more times to get more slack. Then slap a stamp on some slack to the address above and an ex-potential amount of slack will be refurbished.
ilbastardoh
2004-04-12, 18:45
You have no slack you pathological pre-set trail explorer. The ones with true slack, have stupidity so advanced that they can mr.magoo it through life. You're here trying to get rich..pshaw. If you had slack you wouldn't even try, but you'd still get rich.
BD w/ Kung-Fu Grip
2004-04-13, 02:39
quote:Originally posted by ilbastardoh:
You have no slack you pathological pre-set trail explorer. The ones with true slack, have stupidity so advanced that they can mr.magoo it through life. You're here trying to get rich..pshaw. If you had slack you wouldn't even try, but you'd still get rich.
What exactly did you think Bob was about? It is about cashing in on the pinks who want slack, but shall never acheive it. It is about laughing while we have boughten our seat on the ship in advance, as the slackless pinks scramble to make a deal.
Yes, my friends, it is about cashing in on the pinks, so sayeth the bleeding head of Arnold Palmer.
<A HREF="http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/pics2/eyepics/SmArnold.gif">http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/pics2/eyepics/SmArnold.gif" width="90" height="90 (http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/pics2/eyepics/SmArnold.gif" width="90" height="90)</A>
WE WANT HEAD!
ilbastardoh
2004-04-13, 15:31
quote:Originally posted by BD w/ Kung-Fu Grip:
What exactly did you think Bob was about? It is about cashing in on the pinks who want slack, but shall never acheive it. It is about laughing while we have boughten our seat on the ship in advance, as the slackless pinks scramble to make a deal.
Yes, my friends, it is about cashing in on the pinks, so sayeth the bleeding head of Arnold Palmer.
<A HREF="http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/pics2/eyepics/SmArnold.gif"> <A HREF="http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/pics2/eyepics/SmArnold.gif">http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/pics2/eyepics/SmArnold.gif" width="90" height="90 (http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/pics2/eyepics/SmArnold.gif" width="90" height="90)</A> </A>
WE WANT HEAD!
Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow.
The bold and brave Bongmano rescues his post from between two posts about Jew hating. He posts:
SubGenius News Issue 007
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$
$$$$$$$$ HOLY TEMPLE of MASS CONSUMPTION $$$$$$$$$
$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$
$$$$$$ *N*E*W*S $$$$$$$
$$$$$$$ Issue #7 $$$$$$$$
$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$
$$$$$$$$$ Grinding "Bob"s bones into the Ultimate Hamburger $$$$$$$$$$
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
http://www.totse.com/en/religion/subgenius/subg_007.html
Shortly after being weaned from mother's milk, young children are
taught to absorb the junk food of television through their eyeballs.
"Here, kids, suck on this. Just be quiet and don't wake Daddy. If
you're good, you can watch all day, and if you don't see the fnords,
they won't eat you."
Parents are conditioned to feed this teenage mutant fuck you crap to
their kids so that what little brains they inherited from mom and dad
will be so hopelessly atrophied that the final brainwashing will be a
breeze.
Society has now degenerated to the point that when TV does try to put
out a good social message, they have to make it "following the rules,"
rather than "be a good citizen who occasionally gives two neurons
worth of thought toward a fellow human being."
Case in point: A Saturday morning "Public Service Announcement"
starring Conspiracy programmed robots that look like kids telling
other kids out there in the vast video wasteland to "Be Cool. Follow
the rules."
Oh, so back when we were growing up, it was OK to not bend to pressure
from others. "Be yourself," they said. "Don't worry what other
people think. You don't have to do what everyone else tells you to do
to be cool," and nowadays they expect kids to knuckle under to the
peer pressure to "Follow the rules" when just a little while ago they
were saying that it's OK to be different.
I don't know about you, but my kids (when I get around to having some)
are damn sure not going to be little video perfect clones walking
around going "Be Cool. <whir> <click> Be Cool. <whir> <click> Follow
the rules. <whir> <click> Yes, officer my daddy was smoking something
that smelled funny. <whir> <click>"
Saturday morning cartoons and the blipverts in between them are a
prime example of the tools that the Con uses to control people. After
all, money isn't power. He has ultimate power over a thing who can
destroy that thing. The Con wants ultimate power over the human race.
Money is only a Con created tool which allows them to gather up the
real tools they need to exercise their ultimate power. Of course they
don't have any slack so they can't possibly realize that they will only
acheive ultimate power at the moment of their mutual destruction and
won't have even that moment to enjoy it.
There is no longer any slack in Saturday morning cartoons.
Except for Beetle Juice. <whir> <click>
SARDONICPILLOW
2004-04-29, 21:41
<A HREF="http://img42.photobucket.com/albums/v129/SARDONICPILLOW/000_00102222.jpg">http://img42.photobucket.com/albums/v129/SARDONICPILLOW/000_00102222.jpg" width="90" height="90 (http://img42.photobucket.com/albums/v129/SARDONICPILLOW/000_00102222.jpg" width="90" height="90)</A>
Slack Slack Slack with my lobster hand.
seraph~aral
2004-05-10, 04:01
all i know about this BOB nonsense is that somewhere in discordian writing, which i follow (HAIL ERIS --><--) it says that these bob fellows are extremly dangerous and should be avoided.
ilbastardoh
2004-05-12, 23:36
bobbies.
Man I just had the most eerie experience ever, I was in horrible pain last night, the pain was so horrible that I had to puke, and as I was about to puke I saw Bob's head chilln there on the book of the sub genious grinning back at me, at wich point I became furiously angry. It's all conditioning, all of it, what you do to yourself, what others do to you. Even if it's a good positive message it's still brainwashing. Brainwashing yourself to not be brainwashed is the only escape from pinkdom.
ilbastardoh
2004-05-14, 21:12
Your body has a nasty way of changing your perception as does your mind. These are your tools to plug whatever relationship you'd like to establish in the world.
xoctopusx
2004-05-14, 21:49
Ha!I knew there were others here who are in the "know", how long have u been into The Church of the SubGenius? I mean I was captivated by one of their videos that aired on PBS(of all places)and then I became very interested...I know it's all just a for profit scam but it's funny to talk to folks who really think this is some true shit.
ilbastardoh
2004-05-15, 00:53
Well even if is a for profit scam, there is some useful information even if it's fictional. Plus I got the book of the subgenius for $8 for a 200 page book with all those nifty diagrams, it's a bargain if I've ever seen it.
ilbastardoh
2004-05-15, 00:55
I love those rejected fringe religions that are not quite cults or mainstream. It's just inconspicous enough for it to be interesting. Diamonds are only valuable cause they're rare. Without precious possesions thieves cannot flourish.
BAR-BE-QUE OF DOOM (a space age love story)
She led him into the bedroom with a smile on her
lip.
"Aha! Good easy buttsex!" he thought
lackadaisically. "Good thing I brought my penis!" he
chuckled to himself.
"What?" she asked, momentarily unsure of the
situation. After all, he wasn't good looking, what with
a cleft head and all.
"Oh, nothing!" he said with a toothy grin.
"No, really, what?" she said aging.
"Oh, I was just glad I brought this." He reached
into his pocket and pulled out a swollen ivory fist.
"ooooh, ahhhh," she grunted. "That's good, because
I brought THIS!" she reached into her pouch and pulled
out a disfigured foot.
"This will be fun! Just like you promised in your
ad!" he blurted.
She drew him down onto the futon. He lay back, but
something pricked him in the back.
"Ack! What's this?!?" he articulated, pulling a huge
mandible out from under the covers.
"Oh, don't worry yourself with that, love. Look at
this?" she said thrusting her cat in his face.
"What!"
"Oh, woops. I mean this?" she said, shoving her
face in his face.
"Hm." he thought, "she has a weird face." In fact,
she had a huge wiry hair coming out of her tooth. She
kissed him with restrained abandon. The way her hair
tickled his esophagus really excited his pulsating fist.
"Watch this!" he whispered lewdly, hoping to turn
her on. He friskily fluttered his eyeflap at her lap,
which groaned restlessly with a torpid passion.
"Do me!" she said sarcastically. She rolled over
and spread her cheeks in a very ladylike fashion, which
reminded him of Princess Di or Al Sharpton. He drew out
his ivory fist and paused. She reached back and handed
him some tarry looking substance with bits of meat and
bone in it. He lubricated the fist thoughtfully and
gingerly rammed it home. She cried for more while he
increased the tempo of his plunging stroked her well-
formed placenta until she climaxed. A thick and soupy
sludge emerged from her sternum with tired irony.
"oh you're so good!" she sighed. He removed the
fist and she rolled over, gasping for nitrogen. He
pensively caressed her lungbag with his good stump.
Suddenly, she hit him in the head with the
disfigured foot.
"Ngsfll!" he screamed. "What'd you do that for?!?"
"That tickled, " she countered with disdainful
flatulence as she careened his cleft cranium again.
"Snit!" he cried as his tooth flew from his sweaty
mouth.
"C'mere lover. Do me right!" She threw him back
against the bed and straddled him. He smiled in spite
of the blood flowing from his gums. Suddenly, a three
fingered appendage quickly emerged from her gaping
vaginal orifice to grab his manhood. It dropped the leg
and then correctly pulled the pulsating pecker into the.
"Hi-yah!" he screamed wildly. She held him down w/
all of her arms. "Smanch Snig Fnortgobbel Shit!" she
screamed. Her jaws opened to a monstrous proportion and
ripped off his lips with her suction leg. Amidst all of
his screaming and wild gyrating, he strangley thought,
"hm. funny I never noticed those suction legs."
That was the last thought he ever thought, though,
because she then opened her vagina and sucked him in,
where a small creature inside efficiently dismembered his
cerebellum.
"Thanks, Dad." said the creature inside as it
absorbed the flesh voraciously.