Log in

View Full Version : love or god


manniefresh17
2005-01-15, 00:08
Well,to start I want to say that im sikh( a east indian religion)and im very popular at school.My problem is my family would never understand if I was to marry or love any women who is not of my culture.I have dated girls before but the relationship have ended quickly because I feared about dissaponiting my parents and comunitty.Any thoughts of what you would do?

aTribeCalledSean
2005-01-15, 00:17
FIGHT THE POWER!

Yeeeeaaaaah Booooooy!

AngrySquirrel
2005-01-15, 04:45
I would go to White Castle.

Or I would be commanded to kill her like that stupid family drama in 24(I know, I know, you're Indian, but still)

Or I would be like, "Dad, doesn't tradition let you have SEVERAL wives?? I can always bury her in the backyard after the 5th comes out"

Or I could just shut up.

Seriously, I don't know how much the pressure is. Not many people have the kind of family you do in America, and so they would simply suggest that you go with it, keep it secret, or just go in blazing and clash with your parents. But I understand the threat of disownment is very great in the subcontinent, and the fear could make even a secret relationship very stressful. Oh wait, just listen to the dude below me. Eventually even your children will intergrate here if there isn't a racial apocolypse, and your parents must know that you will not pass down their traditions. I doubt that you will convince your parents of anything from the little I know of India.



[This message has been edited by AngrySquirrel (edited 01-15-2005).]

napoleon_complex
2005-01-15, 04:50
Get your parents to meet whoever you're interested in and hope that they are willing to allow you to marry/date whoever you please. Just try to get your parents to realize that people from other religions/cultures are just normal people. I think once they have a face-to-face meeting, they would be more accepting.

AngrySquirrel
2005-01-15, 04:55
quote:Originally posted by napoleon_complex:

Get your parents to meet whoever you're interested in and hope that they are willing to allow you to marry/date whoever you please. Just try to get your parents to realize that people from other religions/cultures are just normal people. I think once they have a face-to-face meeting, they would be more accepting.



I don't know if it's a matter of normal or not, the Jewish people are very strict on their guidelines of racial purity themselves. It must be considered that the traditions must be carried on by blood.

napoleon_complex
2005-01-15, 05:09
I know a few jews who have had interfaith marriages. What you're describing is orthodox judaism, which isn't the most practiced form of judaism.

The majority of all religious people in the world are fairly liberal and would accept people marring between faiths. Both catholicism and Judaism have ceremonies for interfaith weddings and the like.

Zman
2005-01-15, 16:41
Maybe it depends on how much you care yourself about your culture

Satan Jesus
2005-01-16, 04:15
The girl im dating right now had sex with 15 guys before me and is only 16. Obviously society's opinion on my relationships are not of concern to me.

outcast
2005-01-16, 11:51
quote:Originally posted by manniefresh17:

Well,to start I want to say that im sikh( a east indian religion)and im very popular at school.My problem is my family would never understand if I was to marry or love any women who is not of my culture.I have dated girls before but the relationship have ended quickly because I feared about dissaponiting my parents and comunitty.Any thoughts of what you would do?

Isn't it just as easy to find love within your religious community?

Do you like the women of your culture?

Why create strife where it is not needed?

But...then again...why conform to standards that you don't value?

What do you value most?

manniefresh17
2005-01-16, 19:26
The situation right now is iv liked this one girl for a long time and I know she likes me.She is indian aswell but of the hindu religion.Im pretty sure I have to just to talk to my parents about it and get it worked out.My family is pretty religious and pround of it so its going to be hard confronting them about it.

AngrySquirrel
2005-01-16, 21:02
quote:Originally posted by manniefresh17:

The situation right now is iv liked this one girl for a long time and I know she likes me.She is indian aswell but of the hindu religion.Im pretty sure I have to just to talk to my parents about it and get it worked out.My family is pretty religious and pround of it so its going to be hard confronting them about it.

Doesn't sounds like a problem to me. If every person you married had to be Sikh, there would be a hell of a lot of incest. Act like she's been 'converted'.

Soofi
2005-01-20, 08:47
Manniefresh17,

If you are 17 years old, don't worry about marriage just yet.

If your parents talk to you about getting married, start dropping hints, or joke around, saying that you will marry a non-Sikh or Hindu etc.. but do it in an innocent jokingly way. The subliminal effect of this should open your parents up to the idea, even if very little. The minimum, is that they may not be as shocked, rather than surprising them suddenly.

Again, if you are 17, don't fret yourself about marriage... just wait a few years, get to know yourself better, because you are still maturing and need to 'find yourself'. During that time, you will also come to realize, wether this person is the one you want to spend the rest of your life with.

-[Soofi]

GrtZ
2005-01-21, 01:33
quote:Originally posted by manniefresh17:

Well,to start I want to say that im sikh( a east indian religion)and im very popular at school.My problem is my family would never understand if I was to marry or love any women who is not of my culture.I have dated girls before but the relationship have ended quickly because I feared about dissaponiting my parents and comunitty.Any thoughts of what you would do?

love conquers all.

if you really love the person, you wouldn't care about if your community or family is dissappointed of you.