what do they believe? (how we got here, how to get eternal life, all that jazz)

i would prefer if the bullshit was kept to a minimum. ie. don't post if a real mormon could come in here and "prove" you wrong.

I used to date a moron and know some of their ridiculousness. lets see....

The founder of their religion FOUND some tablet or something with all the new words of god, or hte lost scriptures....but he couldn't show anyone it....and he recited it all from memory to someone else.

There were originally WHITE indians here in north america but they got in a war, and the good ones were killed off by the bad ones, who were turned red, how we see them now.

Oh, the second coming of christ is supposed to be soon i think. And it's happening in like Birmingham, Alabam. Or some equally redneck southern city.

I can't remember much else about their beliefs, but I know there is a lot more ridiculous shit they believe.

Also they are supposed to give like 10-15% of their paycheck to the church.

after they graduate high school they are supposed to go and do missionary/recruiting work for like 2 years overseas.

They cant drink anything with booze or caffeine, or anything that alters your mind in any way.

no sex

no masturbation

no cussing.

thats all i can remember right now.

No drugs, jacking off or swearing? Woah another religion that wants me in its hell. I'm too popular.

We believe in God, the Eternal Father, and in His Son, Jesus Christ, and in the Holy Ghost.

We believe that men will be punished for their own sins, and not for Adam's transgression.

We believe that through the Atonement of Christ, all mankind may be saved, by obedience to the laws and ordinances of the Gospel.

We believe that these ordinances1 [the first principles and ordinances of the Gospel]1 are: first, Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ; second, Repentance; third, Baptism by immersion for the remission of sins; fourth, Laying on of hands for the gift of the Holy Ghost.

We believe that a man must be called of God, by prophecy, and by the laying on of hands by those who are in authority, to preach the Gospel and administer in the ordinances thereof.

We believe in the same organization that existed in the Primitive Church, namely, apostles, prophets, pastors, teachers, evangelists, and so forth.

We believe in the gift of tongues, prophecy, revelation, visions, healing, interpretation of tongues, and so forth.

We believe the Bible to be the word of God as far as it is translated correctly; we also believe the Book of Mormon to be the word of God.

We believe all that God has revealed, all that He does now reveal, and we believe that He will yet reveal many great and important things pertaining to the Kingdom of God.

We believe in the literal gathering of Israel and in the restoration of the Ten Tribes; that Zion (the New Jerusalem) will be built upon this1 [the]1 [American]2 continent; that Christ will reign personally upon the earth; and, that the earth will be renewed and receive its paradisiacal glory.

We claim the privilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of our [own]1 conscience, and allow all men the same privilege, let them worship how, where, or what they may.

We believe in being subject to kings, presidents, rulers, and magistrates, in obeying, honoring, and sustaining the law.

We believe in being honest, true, chaste, benevolent, virtuous, and in doing good to all men; indeed, we may say that we follow the admonition of Paul**8212;We believe all things, we hope all things, we have endured many things, and hope to be able to endure all things. If there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things.

But what about the white indians and birmingham as the new zion?? you didnt confirm or deny that.

quote:Originally posted by chickenpoop:

But what about the white indians and birmingham as the new zion?? you didnt confirm or deny that.

Couldn't find anything on wikipedia about it.

i imagine they would be stories in the book of mormon.

thanks guys, i'm off to check out the book of mormon for nonsensical kookiness.

Don't believe that stuff about finding tablets, white indians, and birmingham. That's from an episode of South Park.

quote:Originally posted by muhamutahmatay:

Don't believe that stuff about finding tablets, white indians, and birmingham. That's from an episode of South Park.

No some of it is real. I used to date a moron who confirmed it.

Everything in the South Park episode is accruate i believe. Most of it i know for a fact is accurate. Matt and Trey did a lot of Mormon research for their movie Orgasmo.



Mormons believe that a group of hebrews came to the Americas, and Jesus visited them.

As far as eternal life, they believe that God, Jesus, and the Holy Ghost are seperate beings and that our God is just one of many creators of various universes. If you do good enough, you too will be able to create your own universe. Most peopel will not, and spend eternity in what Christians typically view heaven.

Some info can be found here: http://www.carm.org/lds/lds_doctrines.htm