Totse is a haven for people on the fringe of popular consensus, so I'm hoping that at least one or two people reading this will connect with what I'm trying to say.

I feel like I've been struggling against the tide pretty much as far back as I can remember. Trying to fit in with everyone's values, playing the game according to the rules imposed by the society I'm living in, pretending that the overlap in perception among millions of strangers is the same thing as my perspecive on the world.

But I've reached an impasse. I'm halfway through a university degree in business and political science, and there's no fucking way that I'm going to finish it. If I was studying what I really wanted to be doing, I'd be doing either philosophy or theological studies. I always knew this, but when I was at the stage of deciding my course I totally ignored this, and went for what I thought I should do, and it has been the worst decision of my life.

I won't go into the reasons why I hate what I'm studying, or why I stupidly chose my degree (and before someone suggests it, I can't change degrees without starting from scratch).

To be honest there's a lot I'd rather not get into about my situation, but I'm very seriously considering as a last option to fuck off to India and join an ashram. This isn't some silly pseudo-hippy flight of fancy, if I go for this it'll be an irreversible transformation in my life.

So what I'm asking really, is: does anybody know of a reputable ashram in India, preferably one that is somewhat monastic and ideally long established, and not some fad New Age type place.

i'm joining the french foreign legion in november, but i can understand the urge you are feeling.

No dn't go I've always respected your opinions imperfectcircle.

Oh and the french forign legion rocks.

just do graduate studies in something you like. your graduate education doesn't have to be a continuation of your undergraduate. in fact, it might make it a little easier since you won't have to unlearn anything.

Fanglekai has a good point. You can also continue an entire lifetime of enlightenment and education while still making use of your college degree and having a career, if that is in fact why you pursued a degree.