Especially since it prevents cancer?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/3072021.stm

Once again, I will state, religion doesn't adapt with the times.

Religion is tradition, science is progress.

Choose to live in the past, or the present. Your choice.

Masturbation is Gawd.

And the act brings me closer to her love. And Climax.

Science + Sex = Good

I am no longer Athiest, I am now a masturbatian.

Once again, I will state, religion doesn't adapt with the times.

Religion is tradition, science is progress.

Choose to live in the past, or the present. Your choice.

God indirectly wrote the bible. If this is so, then why would he disagree with masturbation? Especially if he knew it was a natural function that HE created to relieve sexual tension and reduce prostate cancer....It's kind of like if God said eating was a sin...What does God have against natural functions it doesn't make any sense. Answer: There is no God and the whole religious thing is just fuckin' pointless.

God indirectly wrote the bible. If this is so, then why would he disagree with masturbation? Especially if he knew it was a natural function that HE created to relieve sexual tension and reduce prostate cancer....It's kind of like if God said eating was a sin...What does God have against natural functions it doesn't make any sense. Answer: God didn't write the Bible.

Fixed.

One step at a time, my atheist friend.

The bible was made up :O, it lacks naked people, it has no sex that isn't boring.

I prefer to fap to hustler or the kamra Sutra.

There's nothing about masturbation in the bible.

Gen.38:9-10
And Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother's wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother. And the thing which he did displeased the LORD: wherefore he slew him also.

This is as close as the bible comes to talking about masterbation or birth control, and it is really more bout Onan refusing Judah's command (thus God's b/c God told Judah what to do) to fuck his dead brother's wife. Here is all that is known about Onan's brother's death:

Gen.38:7
And Er, Judah's firstborn, was wicked in the sight of the LORD; and the LORD slew him.

Er pissed of God...God killed him...told Judah to tell his son Onan to fuck Er's widow...Onan decided to nut on her stomach or jerk off...God butchers Onan as well.

Moral of the story? Do what God tells you. Some say that the Christian idea of no birth control and no masterbation came from this tale as it is the ONLY thing in the bible that remotely discusses the topic.

What a wonderful deity. Most of the shit in the old testement goes like this:

God: DO WHAT THE FUCK I SAY OR I WILL KILL YOU OR YOUR LOVED ONES, AND CONDEMN THEIR SPIRITS TO ETERNAL TORMENT.......BUT I LOVE YOU?

I think God wants us to be miserable.

I bet god masturbates. If I believed in it.

Cthulhu doesn't mind if you masturbate, as he's gonna fucking kill you all the same!

Worship Cthulhu today!

God: DO WHAT THE FUCK I SAY OR I WILL KILL YOU OR YOUR LOVED ONES, AND CONDEMN THEIR SPIRITS TO ETERNAL TORMENT.......BUT I LOVE YOU?

LAWL!!!

Saying that out loud made me laugh :D

Back to the topic:

As everyone else has said, there doesn't seem to be a 'thou shalt not masturbate' in the Bible.

I suppose that you could argue that masturbation leads one to become more attached to the flesh, and more likely to commit 'Sexually immoral acts', and so lead you further away from God.

'Course, I'd probaly also try arguing the oppsite; that masturbation reduces sexual tension and reduces the liklihood of commiting sexually immoral acts.... And cancer :rolleyes:

Personally I don't think any 'sexually immoral act' is inherently wrong. I think that is frowned upon because most people will become attached to the material pleasures and will turn away from any spirituality to fulfill the bodies desires. Sex out of love isn't bad because it does involve love, and not just lust, and Love is a pretty good path to being a good person. Paul says that you should avoid marriage if you can, because once you have conqured bodily desires the path to God is easier, but seeing as most people wanna score, marriage is the best place to score, and a good compromise.

Or something.

Cthulhu doesn't mind if you masturbate, as he's gonna fucking kill you all the same!

Worship Cthulhu today!

http://lolthulhu.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/06/internet-o_rlyeh_2.jpg

I love HP Lovecraft :D

That is not dead which can eternal lie.
And with strange æons even death may die.

God gaves us hands, he wants us to fap.

God hates us all.

I bet god masturbates. If I believed in it.

That's why it rains. <_<

That's why it rains. <_<

Thats why all love films have that seen where people kiss in the rain at the end of the movie...

Fixed.

One step at a time, my atheist friend.

Satan Did... why else would there need to be multiple varations of the same religeous text. Torah/Bible/Qur'an all have people that are bent on killing each other for spirtual superiority.

HAIL ODIN

Cthulhu doesn't mind if you masturbate, as he's gonna fucking kill you all the same!

Worship Cthulhu today!

You sir have made my day.

God wants us to masterbate. Stand up. Now let your hands fall. Now place them on whatever junk you have. See? Perfect length. Therefore God not only approves of masterbation, but Intelligent Design must be true too.

Thats why all love films have that seen where people kiss in the rain at the end of the movie...

I lol'd

You know how in the Old Testament, God was full of Wroth and Vengeance? You did bad stuff, he rained brimstone down on your ungrateful ass or harassed your people with 7 plagues.

In the New Testament, its like he has turned over a new leaf, you don't hear so much of the nasty things he did to his people (because if you believe in it, everyone on earth is his creation), and he's all about "love thy neighbour" and "vengeance is bad, love thy enemy".

But it all makes sense if you remember what happened around the time between the New Testament and the Old Testament.. He got laid.

God hates us all.

Yeah he fucking hates me

God wants nothing of us, and has no preferences regarding our behavior, so long as it expresses our greatest and grandest conception of ourselves.

When I was actively addicted, and was essentially a morally and spiritually bankrupt individual, God still loved watched over me, saying in effect "Fine--if being a worth less drunk and stoner is the best you can come up with for yourself, go for it."

When I was actively addicted, and was essentially a morally and spiritually bankrupt individual, God still loved watched over me, saying in effect "Fine--if being a worth less drunk and stoner is the best you can come up with for yourself, go for it."

That is alcoholism and drug addiction.

You can masturbate and not be "morally/spiritually bankrupt".

Because every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten.
Please, think of the kittens.

:(

Because every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten.
Please, think of the kittens.

:(

http://www.memoryhole.net/~kyle/humor/God_Kills_A_Kitten.jpg

http://www.memoryhole.net/~kyle/humor/God_Kills_A_Kitten.jpg

http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/thumb/9/9d/God_kills_grues.PNG/588px-God_kills_grues.PNG

He doesn't want us to be happy, he tries to make us think the only way we're going to be happy is by worshiping him so we won't go to Hell for eternity.

He doesn't want us to be happy, he tries to make us think the only way we're going to be happy is by worshiping him so we won't go to Hell for eternity.

No. The way it went is that he created us, then realised that he messed things up; but instead of accepting his mistake and recreating us from scratch, he kicked the voice of reason out of Heavens (Lucifer), and wiped the humanity, hoping to breed a better race instead. This failed, so he killed a bunch of other people here and there again randomly; in the end none of that worked, he got tired of the whole thing, declared us Abandonware and so basically, we're now on our own. And I tell you what, I'm not sure if we should be sad or if we should be celebrating.

No. The way it went is that he created us, then realised that he messed things up; but instead of accepting his mistake and recreating us from scratch, he kicked the voice of reason out of Heavens (Lucifer), and wiped the humanity, hoping to breed a better race instead. This failed, so he killed a bunch of other people here and there again randomly; in the end none of that worked, he got tired of the whole thing, declared us Abandonware and so basically, we're now on our own. And I tell you what, I'm not sure if we should be sad or if we should be celebrating.

C'mon, he's supposed to be a god. He's perfect, he wouldn't make a mistake. Even if he did he could fix everything with a snap of his fingers.

I don't really think there could be a "God". A creating force, yes, but not a "God".

C'mon, he's supposed to be a god. He's perfect, he wouldn't make a mistake. Even if he did he could fix everything with a snap of his fingers.


Well, if you were a God, that's what you would want your creations to think, right?

God doesn't want us to masturbate 'cause way back in the iron age, people needed to fuck like rabbits to survive. You needed at least like 10 children, just so 1 would live on to support you as you got old (about mid 30s, if you were lucky). If we believe in conspiracies, we'd say the fuckers who were controlling everyone through this 'God' idea decided it was better if people spent more time fucking and less fapping. Hell, it was better for them- look where we are now? This earth is ours, bitches.

That is alcoholism and drug addiction.

You can masturbate and not be "morally/spiritually bankrupt".

Perhaps I failed to make myself clear.

Point is, WHATEVER you do is okay with God.

God neither judges nor punsihes.

God doesn't want us to masturbate 'cause way back in the iron age, people needed to fuck like rabbits to survive. You needed at least like 10 children, just so 1 would live on to support you as you got old (about mid 30s, if you were lucky). If we believe in conspiracies, we'd say the fuckers who were controlling everyone through this 'God' idea decided it was better if people spent more time fucking and less fapping. Hell, it was better for them- look where we are now? This earth is ours, bitches.

Fuckin' owned those bears.

Fuckin' owned those bears.

In Soviet Russia, the bears own you.

http://blog.artnn.ru/images_2006/preved_surprise.jpg

Masturbation is Gawd.

And the act brings me closer to her love. And Climax.

Science + Sex = Good

I am no longer Athiest, I am now a masturbatian.
Kudos. Lol. very nice religion.

Kudos. Lol. very nice religion.

Yeah, except during church services, the collection plate tends to fill up with sticky Kleenex.

LoL, I like the title but, let me make this clear:

Religious people (priests and pastors) with abstinence on the mind are the ones who do not want you to explore your sexuality. In fact, historically in the beginning for Christianity, You had a group of Gnostic's and the Roman Church. the creation myth in Roman Church says sex is the root all evil and should be repressed. While a particular group of Gnostic's had there creation myth and it involved a lot of sex. Of course as history has shown has the Gnostic's were almost obliterated by the Roman church.

To other gnostics sex is regarded as sacred to others its just sex... It depends where you look but, masturbation like anything isn't problem so as long as you can stop when you want to instead of being addicted to the act of abusing yourself, because, that leads to other mental problems (not madness) but like child molestation among other things.

instead of being addicted to the act of abusing yourself, because, that leads to other mental problems (not madness) but like child molestation among other things.

How on earth can you equate giving yourself some harmless pleasure with "abusing yourself." Good grief, how puritanical can one get?

And do you seriously think that if someone jerks off too much (and who is to say how much is too much--you?), he will run out and start raping babies? If anything, baby-rapers do not jerk off ENOUGH.

God neither judges nor punsihes.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heaven
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pergatory

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/9/9a/Purgatory4.png

That is what is taught by the major Abrahamic religions today.

I think I'm going to go prevent cancer right... NOW.

Girls and Guys both Jerk-off what I am trying to say is that it can become and addiction if you do to much of it and when that happens see if you can stop for a week? a month? I guarantee that much.

Im not trying to be dark ages over here... But Lust leads to other things... even if its not molestation... Like those stories of Guys who jerk off to porn and become infatuated with it that they don't derive any pleasure when they do it with someone. Hell some end up getting a divorce because, Porn taken over there mind.

That is what is taught by the major Abrahamic religions today.

Read the Bible instead of trusting the corrupted and deceitful words of man!

Ephesians 2:8-9
"8For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:

9Not of works, lest any man should boast."

Keep in mind Paul didn't write half the stuff thats in the bible its been reprocessed again and again and many scribes derive from the previous copy and what about editing process. In fact most of what Paul had to say has been written by not one man named Paul but many men.

I bet god masturbates.

where do you think rain comes from, silly?

where do you think rain comes from, silly?

You mean snow/rainy snow?