So, I got really down and I burned my arm. * long story short*

The guy I talked to said that it was a learned beavior, and I can unlearn it. But the problem is I don't think it is. Now I am on medicine,I think it is called celexa, I have the generic form. And I have been taking it for a week. The problem is at night I am kept awake by really wanting to kill myself, I have never had thoughts about suicide and I can't tell them I want out.

I was fine before I joined, I was somewhat happy, and I had some shit going for me, but now I am miserable, I have had two friends die, I barely talk to my family because when I do I get really angry. I get really angry, Really easily, and I never used to get mad. When I was home I just withdrew from everything and drank a lot, and some shit happened at home, and I scare myself now. I am not me anymore and I am really genuinly scared of what I could do.

Any advice is greatly welcome, and I don't really want to talk to anyone about it because if I do I will be out for sure, and I don't know what to do if that happens.

Have you spoken to a chaplain? Unless he feels you're a danger to yourself, or anyone else, he won't recommend anything adverse be done to you.

I know what you are talking about getting angry out of nowhere when you normally wouldn't even flinch.

How long has it been since you came back?

/me looks around....

Still here. :/ . I was going to go to mental health tommorow on my lunch, but I think it would be easier to see a chaplin. at the same time I don't want to because I fucking scare myself shitless. Its not really during the day or when I am reading or listening to music, or keeping busy. It's usually when I am alone, and am trying to sleep. Last night I got 2 hours of sleep because my thoughts consume my head.

/me looks around....

Still here. :/ . I was going to go to mental health tommorow on my lunch, but I think it would be easier to see a chaplin. at the same time I don't want to because I fucking scare myself shitless. Its not really during the day or when I am reading or listening to music, or keeping busy. It's usually when I am alone, and am trying to sleep. Last night I got 2 hours of sleep because my thoughts consume my head.

Comparing my stress to yours would be an insult. I sit at a terminal tracking IP addresses and make phone calls to different task force groups directing their actions based on what I see. You, on the other hand...

My best advice has already been suggested. Talk to a chaplain. You NEED to, I believe. And work out a lot. Give yourself a goal for when you leave. That'll also help you with sleeping at night.

Ya, the chaplin will confidentialy hook you up with some sleep aids. For antidepressants your chain of command will be notified, I beleive.

A couple months ago, they also passed some legislation to guarentee that seeking physciatric help will not hinder your goverment career.

How much longer do you have to go?

I would advise against this, but 3 guys from my parent brigade claimed ptsd and the bridage sent them back, no questions asked. They were pogs who had never left the wire. I guess the army is cracking down on the treatment/statistics of mental patients.

Are you burning off enough physical energy? I know that I haven't been slacking when I fall asleep & wake up in the same position I started off in. Usually I toss & turn, especially if my thoughts start churning.

If my body has been active enough instead of just mental tiredness, I find I avoid the dropping off like a rock & then waking a few hours later with my mind racing. Have you already tried working out?

I find Vitamin C fruits & Omega-3's from fish are nothing to laugh at either. I have a hard enough time thinking clearly when I don't get enough of those two. If you're getting enough of those two: go for half again or double for a while.

Some studies comparing the rates of depression between Kiwis & Japanese seemed to (?) find that it was the much greater seafood consumption that led to depression rates in J-land being 1/7th those of Kiwis.

Some studies say Vitamin D, like from Cod Liver Oil, is anti-depressive too...unless you're already getting more sun on your skin making D than you can stand already? Eating is a lot easier than working out & is something you can do sitting down.

I'm still depressed? I'm way...happier about it though...:confused:

>>>Of course, a brain and memory that works more efficiently? Then comes the dilemma: you can't live an effective life without a decent memory? On the other hand: how do you live a life with one? :) As a guy who's too slack I can appreciate those who say keeping busy is the only way to get through.

"Busy" (I think) is productive stuff... More than playing on the computer or watching vids. Whatever it may be: it's things that keep you too busy to remember stuff you don't want to. I've always figured that that is the shit that got all those WW2 & before Vets through. The Work Ethic. (Hah!)

Though, I imagine that you can imagine a WW1 Vet telling the stories no one wants to hear/ever heard that could make you puke. A lot of those guys somehow lived until they were very old. ??? Maybe so much of what they saw was so improbably gross & stupid that even though they were their they couldn't believe it? Or too ???

I would advise against this, but 3 guys from my parent brigade claimed ptsd and the bridage sent them back, no questions asked. They were pogs who had never left the wire. I guess the army is cracking down on the treatment/statistics of mental patients.

What the OP has is textbook PTSD, through and through. What an epiphany huh? People in the military (especially during a time of combat) are emotionally and mentally scarred for life. Seriously folks......have none of you read any books or encountered people in your friends/family that were vets of other wars???? Nam, Korea, WWII?

Savin Jesus.....you got what you asked for. You WILLINGLY enlisted into the armed forces during a time of combat/conflict across the globe, and now you are paying one of the possible expected (least I thought it was expected from most people's common knowledge) prices one has to pay for experiencing all of that.

The good news is you are young and could legitimately have 50+ years to get used to the new you. Hell, in enough time people will just view you as a grouchy old geezer...and your military experience will have no relevance at all. Congrats on all of those great life choices you've made.......

I'm going to put my general dislike of soldiers on hold for a moment and try and give you the stone cold truth.

I agree with DaGuru, my long distance armchair diagnosis is PTSD. And you have already reached the stage of being a danger to yourself or others.

This will end in one of two ways.

Either you'll do a 9mm mouthwash or you'll go postal and spend the rest of life in the rubber room.

Thats the truth.

Unless you get treatment NOW, today for preference.

You swallow your pride and you risk your career (because its over anyway if you do nothing) and you march your sorry arse to the doctor.

I'm going to put my general dislike of soldiers on hold for a moment and try and give you the stone cold truth.

I agree with DaGuru, my long distance armchair diagnosis is PTSD. And you have already reached the stage of being a danger to yourself or others.

This will end in one of two ways.

Either you'll do a 9mm mouthwash or you'll go postal and spend the rest of life in the rubber room.

Thats the truth.

Unless you get treatment NOW, today for preference.

You swallow your pride and you risk your career (because its over anyway if you do nothing) and you march your sorry arse to the doctor.

^ This.

See a doctor or see a chaplain.

If the doctor option fails you can always do the Garand+Clocktower thing.

Any advice is greatly welcome, and I don't really want to talk to anyone about it because if I do I will be out for sure, and I don't know what to do if that happens.

I was going to lazily post "If you can, get the fuck out A.S.A.P.", but Jackketch's more appropriate response is the one of which you should really take heed.

I talked to the chaplin, and he is sending me to mental health again, sooooo. Yea, They definatlly think I am crazy.

I talked to the chaplin, and he is sending me to mental health again, sooooo. Yea, They definatlly think I am crazy.

My dad worked two jobs. One during the day and one during the night. He got so little sleep that after about a month he went to the mental hospital, but he wasn't crazy.

No worries, man. It's just situational circumstances. At least you're getting helped.

So, I got really down and I burned my arm. * long story short*

The guy I talked to said that it was a learned beavior, and I can unlearn it. But the problem is I don't think it is. Now I am on medicine,I think it is called celexa, I have the generic form. And I have been taking it for a week. The problem is at night I am kept awake by really wanting to kill myself, I have never had thoughts about suicide and I can't tell them I want out.

I was fine before I joined, I was somewhat happy, and I had some shit going for me, but now I am miserable, I have had two friends die, I barely talk to my family because when I do I get really angry. I get really angry, Really easily, and I never used to get mad. When I was home I just withdrew from everything and drank a lot, and some shit happened at home, and I scare myself now. I am not me anymore and I am really genuinly scared of what I could do.

Any advice is greatly welcome, and I don't really want to talk to anyone about it because if I do I will be out for sure, and I don't know what to do if that happens.

Welcome to what the Army doesn't prepare you for when you see human life taken, and take human life.

Yea, sooo. I have done some research,

http://www.objector.org/girights/gettingout/odpmc.html

http://www.objector.org/girights/gettingout/odpmcfacts.html#pgfId-1000161

http://www.objector.org/girights/gettingout/needtoknow.html#76154

not really an objector, but they had good info.

http://www.girightshotline.org/discharges/odpmc/army/index.shtml

near the bottom.,

I have little idea: how many Vets can actually look back & say that "Professional" help helped them? How many citizens can say that the pro help helped them with citizen probs? I imagine some of it depends on luck: the mesh between the client & the person trying to help them. Not every helper is the same.

I know that on the news today, they were saying how Canuck Vets from the 'Stan don't like their "pro help" because it usually comes from plain citizens (with degrees of course), & that it's from 40 year old women. Who've prob not ever worn army boots.

Thus the Can-Gov is trying to get Vets to train as therapists.

As it's a private thing, as is traditional with Vets, I get most of my view of therapy from reading Doonesbury, where BD the coach, lost a leg in Iraq. He comes back & does his reintegration into society with other Vets under the leadership of a Vet.

Yea, sooo. I have done some research,

http://www.objector.org/girights/gettingout/odpmc.html

http://www.objector.org/girights/gettingout/odpmcfacts.html#pgfId-1000161

http://www.objector.org/girights/gettingout/needtoknow.html#76154

not really an objector, but they had good info.

http://www.girightshotline.org/discharges/odpmc/army/index.shtml

near the bottom.,

This whole thread amuses me. Its like a microcosm of this entire forum. Here you wanted the military section so badly....and the ONLY thing of any substance you've said here is...." Mommy....I wanna get OUT!!!!!".

Just like the mods bitching about political discourse, and those horrible recruiters, and all the other crying and whining going on here.

It's not that I want out, I just get really down. I am glad you really think that, as does everyone else.

I get two hours of sleep if that.

Have you tried being less self absorbed?

So, I got really down and I burned my arm. * long story short*

The guy I talked to said that it was a learned beavior, and I can unlearn it. But the problem is I don't think it is. Now I am on medicine,I think it is called celexa, I have the generic form. And I have been taking it for a week. The problem is at night I am kept awake by really wanting to kill myself, I have never had thoughts about suicide and I can't tell them I want out.

I was fine before I joined, I was somewhat happy, and I had some shit going for me, but now I am miserable, I have had two friends die, I barely talk to my family because when I do I get really angry. I get really angry, Really easily, and I never used to get mad. When I was home I just withdrew from everything and drank a lot, and some shit happened at home, and I scare myself now. I am not me anymore and I am really genuinly scared of what I could do.

Any advice is greatly welcome, and I don't really want to talk to anyone about it because if I do I will be out for sure, and I don't know what to do if that happens.

LOL!

Fuck you, you fucking traitor. This is what you deserve. You went to an unconstitutional, undeclared and illegal war. You take an oath to uphold the constitution and you didn't do that. Go kill yourself.

But if you don't want to kill yourself I suggest getting off the meds the government gives you because they are doing it to poison your mind.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080529/ap_on_go_ca_st_pe/military_suicides

Now OP remember, if you are going to add to the ever climbing statistics of military suicides.....at least don't die in vain. Give good ole Jeff Hunter some of that free publicity and make sure you have Totse on your puter screen before splattering your brains all over the wall behind you. Hell, you could even have this forum or even this thread up when they discover the corpse.

Gotta love the one quote in that article though.....

"Even more startling is that during this same period, 10 to 20 times as many soldiers have thought to harm themselves or attempted suicide."

Yup, that good ole military is really "making men" out of those looking for direction in their lives, ain't it????

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2007/09/06/health/main3239837.shtml

The suicide rate for females is going up, too, so if you're considering a sex change, be sure to keep this in mind as well!!

:rolleyes:

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2007/09/06/health/main3239837.shtml

The suicide rate for females is going up, too, so if you're considering a sex change, be sure to keep this in mind as well!!

:rolleyes:

Well then Mr. Moderator.......why don't you move this thread to a different section, and then we can properly digress this discussion into a new direction. You wouldn't want to be guilty of hijacking or trolling threads off course now, would ya?

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2007/09/06/health/main3239837.shtml

The suicide rate for females is going up, too, so if you're considering a sex change, be sure to keep this in mind as well!!

:rolleyes:

Irrelevant and diversionary statistical comparisons do nothing to refute DaGuru's implication, that the military is failing to address potentially fatal problems with soldiers psychological welfare.

Irrelevant and diversionary statistical comparisons do nothing to refute DaGuru's implication, that the military is failing to address potentially fatal problems with soldiers psychological welfare.

Probably the truth, in layman's terms, is simply that people who join the army tend to be psychologically 'weak' individuals, with little feeling of self worth. The sort of person who will embrace being *liberated* from personal responsibility and can intregrate into the hive mentality.

Probably the truth, in layman's terms, is simply that people who join the army tend to be psychologically 'weak' individuals, with little feeling of self worth. The sort of person who will embrace being *liberated* from personal responsibility and can intregrate into the hive mentality.

Given the statistics (http://www.crisis.org.uk/media/display.php?id=13) regarding homeless ex-serviceman, I strongly agree with you Jack. Re-integrating into 'civvy street' presents significant problems for, what I believe, are people who have effectively become instutionalized by what you call the "hive mentality". More recent figures appear to indicate (fairly ambigously it seems) the situation has improved slightly, (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/6934300.stm) although they do predict a possible reversal of this trend due to the conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan.

And here's some more 'fun facts' about post-military life in the UK:

— Ex-Service homeless people are older (50% are over 50 and 25% were over 60);

— They have been homeless for longer;

— They are more likely to be affected by drink and physical health problems;

Source (http://www.parliament.the-stationery-office.co.uk/pa/cm200001/cmselect/cmdfence/29/29ap15.htm) for above.

So it seems even if you're young and ok now, there's an increased chance you'll end up homeless later in life due to the mental effects of military service. This appears due primarily to emptional and psychological difficulties within the home and in marriage (breakdown), for example. (http://www.nytimes.com/2007/02/23/us/23military.html) The source here is American, by the problems and consequences are trans-Atlantic. There's also plenty of documentation on the stress caused by trying to impose military-conditioned thinking on to a civilian relationship. And Christ, from personal experience, I should know, my father spent the years of 1939-1953 in the Coldstream Guards.

Oh, and before I go... OhhRah!

Good luck.

War is a terrible thing. If you believe in this war, get help, and continue fighting. If you really oppose it: try to get out on psychological grounds.

You'll feel better once your out of that bullshit.

Also, talk to your family and people that you are close with, this is when you need them.