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View Full Version : Skip the four play: You too ugly


TooSeeI
2008-12-26, 05:45
So I'm about to meet up with a special lady friend of mine for some drinks, with no doubt the evening will quickly turn to sex. What would be the best way for me to get straight to hitting in? This girl is SO ugly in the face and loves to kiss n shit, but has an amazin body.

What should I do?

twotimintim
2008-12-26, 05:47
So I'm about to meet up with a special lady friend of mine for some drinks, with no doubt the evening will quickly turn to sex. What would be the best way for me to get straight to hitting in? This girl is SO ugly in the face and loves to kiss n shit, but has an amazin body.

What should I do?

Is her face un- kissable?

maybe go for her neck as a start..?

Put a bag on her head?

pink smoke
2008-12-26, 05:50
This thread is full of fail.




From now on, this thread will be about...

something else.

TooSeeI
2008-12-26, 05:53
Is her face un- kissable?

maybe go for her neck as a start..?

Put a bag on her head?

Not necessarily although there's a possibility of her big forehead/nose interfering.

pink smoke
2008-12-26, 05:54
Your name is like the drug, right? 2CI?

See, I can get that. ElementLady89...still don't see the play on words.

Obviously it's not that clever.

Or perhaps too clever.

I'm too lazy to care.

TooSeeI
2008-12-26, 06:03
Your name is like the drug, right? 2CI?

I suppose.

pink smoke
2008-12-26, 06:04
Maybe not? Oh well.

Also - it's foreplay, not four play.

TooSeeI
2008-12-26, 06:09
Maybe not? Oh well.

Also - it's foreplay, not four play.

*noted*

Care to bring anything else to my attention?

Silverfuck
2008-12-26, 06:20
If you can't spell it you shouldn't be doing it.

TooSeeI
2008-12-26, 06:28
If you can't spell it you shouldn't be doing it.

I don't think this will work.

Silverfuck
2008-12-26, 06:31
That rules out copulation and fornication as well. Totally off-limits.

BurNinHeLL1232
2008-12-26, 06:32
Offer a anal licking, is that doesnt work murder/suicide..

TooSeeI
2008-12-26, 06:38
That rules out copulation and fornication as well. Totally off-limits.

No just the boring stuff..

pink smoke
2008-12-26, 06:39
*noted*

Care to bring anything else to my attention?

Your irrefutable inadequacies. If you have to ask Totse how to fuck an otherwise okay girl, you're either a sad, lonely virgin, or too stupid to get anyone else. There's alcohol, drink until you don't care anymore. Close your eyes. Slowly push her head down after you kiss her. Tons of things any normal guy could come up with.

I wonder why there has been a wave of retarded threads made by new arrivals.

Coincidence? I think not.

Silverfuck
2008-12-26, 06:42
Your irrefutable inadequacies. If you have to ask Totse how to fuck an otherwise okay girl, you're either a sad, lonely virgin, or too stupid to get anyone else. There's alcohol, drink until you don't care anymore. Close your eyes. Slowly push her head down after you kiss her. Tons of things any normal guy could come up with.

I wonder why there has been a wave of retarded threads made by new arrivals.

Coincidence? I think not.

You're being badly trolled, d00d.

jewishnazi
2008-12-26, 06:43
So I'm about to meet up with a special lady friend of mine for some drinks, with no doubt the evening will quickly turn to sex. What would be the best way for me to get straight to hitting in? This girl is SO ugly in the face and loves to kiss n shit, but has an amazin body.

What should I do?

i dunno man:confused: im having the same problem with your mom

pink smoke
2008-12-26, 06:45
You're being badly trolled, d00d.

Ah.

Haha. Sorry, it's late.

TooSeeI
2008-12-26, 06:58
You're being badly trolled, d00d.

Sadly no. It's really more of predicament...You see if I hit it then all my friends who have strictly advised me not to will harass me til the end of time about. But if I don't then I missed out on some great poon. So if i do something cool ya know like put a bag on her head, then everyone will be jealous cause they aren't as awesome.

Audiofile
2008-12-26, 07:33
Grab her right (HAS to be right, or you'll fuck it up) boob. If she doesn't say anything, grab the other (Left. Not your left, but her left. So it would be the right one. Right?) boob.

Then proceed to fondle her however you want/stick penis in vagoo.

Staples
2008-12-26, 07:37
murder/suicide

Rykoshet
2008-12-26, 07:57
Not to mention fellatio, cunnilingus, and "parking the pink plymouth in the garage of love"

Promethazine
2008-12-26, 08:21
Whenever it comes time to kiss her, close your eyes and think of Pimp C rapping this like "I got money, I got clothes, i got whips, I got hoes." and picture all sorts of cadillacs and shit swangin across a major street.

next think ya know your eyes are open and you're smiling like you enjoyed it.

i said this not as a joke but because it fucking works.

chasm69
2008-12-26, 08:33
If you are sinking to this girl that you can't even bring yourself to look at is it maybe that your looks arn't all that great?

If your friends are telling you not to does this mean she has approached them and they knocked her back? Labelling you her last ditch effort?

If this is the case then a paper bag over your head would do fine. That way she doesn't have to look at the face of the guy she picked last and you don't have to look at the face of the only girl with a good body you can get your grubby little hands to.

Now Enjoy.

Malkog
2008-12-26, 10:06
See, I can get that. ElementLady89...still don't see the play on words.

Obviously it's not that clever.

Or perhaps too clever.

I'm too lazy to care.

I think it's all about the extra 'l' right? Makes it Elle-mentLady89. Her name's probably elle. That's the best I can fucking do anyway.

OP have you considered not having sex with a girl you don't find attractive facially? Or maybe just avert your eyes.

Agent 008
2008-12-26, 11:08
This thread is useless without pics.

Robolrich
2008-12-26, 11:11
I'm sorry, but I draw the line at three baggers.

Flawless Logic
2008-12-26, 14:46
booze and kissing her neck will do wonders

L'Explorateur
2008-12-26, 15:01
How about you just save what little dignity you have left and try to get a better looking girl to take home?

TooSeeI
2008-12-26, 17:56
This thread is useless without pics.

http://i547.photobucket.com/albums/hh445/tooseei/buttlicker.jpg

WorldFavor
2008-12-26, 18:14
http://i547.photobucket.com/albums/hh445/tooseei/buttlicker.jpg

Her face just look toooo bad. Maybe it's just the picture, or I haven't been laid in too long.

Kyoki
2008-12-26, 18:47
BLINDFOLD HER!!!

Girls do tend to like it. Just get a blind fold that will cover from eyebrow to mouth (silk scarf etc) and tie it on her. All you'll be looking at is her lips and she'll never realise why.

DeliciousCrack
2008-12-26, 19:01
butter face nigga

and you misspelled foreplay

CosmicExplosionofFlavor
2008-12-26, 19:51
butter face nigga

and you misspelled foreplay

I must say kind sir I would absolutely love some delicious crack!

whitelightning
2008-12-26, 20:14
Whenever it comes time to kiss her, close your eyes and think of Pimp C rapping this like "I got money, I got clothes, i got whips, I got hoes." and picture all sorts of cadillacs and shit swangin across a major street.

next think ya know your eyes are open and you're smiling like you enjoyed it.

i said this not as a joke but because it fucking works.

haha good advice RIP PIMP C

Hazzard
2008-12-26, 21:09
http://i547.photobucket.com/albums/hh445/tooseei/buttlicker.jpg

O shit O shit, that's hideous. The body seems good enough for the pushin', but that face would throw me off course as well. Have the face concealed at all costs, or else your find your erection flopping in no time by the looks of it...

electric_wizard
2008-12-26, 22:52
This thread is full of fail.




From now on, this thread will be about...

something else.

Don't steal my thing, you pink motherfucker :mad:

WritingANovel
2008-12-26, 23:18
Your name is like the drug, right? 2CI?

See, I can get that. ElementLady89...still don't see the play on words.

Obviously it's not that clever.

Or perhaps too clever.

I'm too lazy to care.

sorry..what was the play on words for elementlady89....i found this ``actinium is dangerously radioactive. The chemical behaviour of actinium is similar to that of the rare earths, particularly lanthanum. It is found naturally in uranium ores and actinium is 150 times more radioactive than radium``....:confused:

WritingANovel
2008-12-26, 23:19
If you can't spell it you shouldn't be doing it.

beg to differ

a lot of people can`t spell ménage à trois

WritingANovel
2008-12-26, 23:21
http://i547.photobucket.com/albums/hh445/tooseei/buttlicker.jpg

uhm

that girl is supposed to be ugly or what

you guys have got to be kidding me

if shes ugly then i havent got any hope

Malkog
2008-12-26, 23:25
i havent got any hope

I thought you would've worked that out by now.

BurNinHeLL1232
2008-12-26, 23:40
uhm

that girl is supposed to be ugly or what

you guys have got to be kidding me

if shes ugly then i havent got any hope

No hope? don't mind us, we're just shallow

WritingANovel
2008-12-27, 00:04
I thought you would've worked that out by now.

it usually takes a few tries for it to sink in

No hope? don't mind us, we're just shallow

naw, not shallow. just the way guys are; i mean you ARE wired to be visual

That being said, you seem to have missed my point, which was that that girl really wasn`t that bad to look at...am i right

Robolrich
2008-12-27, 01:56
buther face nigga

and you misspelled foreplay

fixed

bagel = delicious snack
2008-12-27, 07:58
If you can't spell it you shouldn't be doing it.

here here

please stop cluttering the world with idiots and simply kill yourself.

Rainycity
2008-12-27, 08:30
So I'm about to meet up with a special lady friend of mine for some drinks, with no doubt the evening will quickly turn to sex. What would be the best way for me to get straight to hitting in? This girl is SO ugly in the face and loves to kiss n shit, but has an amazin body.

What should I do?

tell her you have bad breathe or a cancor sore, something to do with the mouth works all the time

Hazzard
2008-12-27, 09:59
My heart bleeds for you WAN; you can't be serious when you say you're worst than that creature, am I right?

hazode
2008-12-27, 14:03
You could mix it up a little and shove a highlighter up her ass. Then after that you can go kill yourself

Have fun

TooSeeI
2008-12-27, 20:09
That being said, you seem to have missed my point, which was that that girl really wasn`t that bad to look at...am i right

Oo shes much more hideous in person please believe.

Baron
2008-12-27, 21:53
Oo shes much more hideous in person please believe.

Its hard to tell with her face all contorted like that.

Gadooosh!
2008-12-28, 00:09
it usually takes a few tries for it to sink in



naw, not shallow. just the way guys are; i mean you ARE wired to be visual

That being said, you seem to have missed my point, which was that that girl really wasn`t that bad to look at...am i right

it's ironic, there's so many guys out there that won't even get with a girl if she's not looking like some fucking supermodel, even though they can be far from attractive themselves...

TooSeeI
2008-12-28, 01:03
it's ironic, there's so many guys out there that won't even get with a girl if she's not looking like some fucking supermodel, even though they can be far from attractive themselves...

OK lets not get it twisted now, I'm damn fine. If I was ugly I would of fucked this bitch already.

Silverfuck
2008-12-28, 01:17
it's ironic, there's so many guys out there that won't even get with a girl if she's not looking like some fucking supermodel, even though they can be far from attractive themselves...

And then, when they can't get a girl who meets their 'standards,' they get bitter and angry and decide that all women are sluts and shallow bitches.

TooSeeI
2008-12-28, 01:19
And then, when they can't get a girl who meets their 'standards,' they get bitter and angry and decide that all women are sluts and shallow bitches.

That and their mental inferiority to men of course.

pink smoke
2008-12-28, 17:53
Don't steal my thing, you pink motherfucker :mad:

I apologize.


I failed.

invisiblecincinnati
2008-12-28, 20:26
Not necessarily although there's a possibility of her big forehead/nose interfering.


i know this chick where do you live?

TooSeeI
2008-12-29, 08:26
i know this chick where do you live?

Stfu you don't know shit.:mad:

arquin
2008-12-29, 10:47
No matter how many people try and justify it this way: Having a good body is no excuse for fucking some one with an ugly face.

You are, in effect, just fucking an ugly chick. Well done, you fucking loser. How does the rest of society's scraps taste? God damn bottom feeders.

Hazzard
2008-12-29, 12:35
OK lets not get it twisted now, I'm damn fine. If I was ugly I would of fucked this bitch already.

You seem pretty full of yourself. Post pics and we'll be the judges of your attractiveness to the opposite sex.

calmmind
2008-12-29, 17:00
fucking a chick with a hot body and bad face is way better than fapping. Just turn the lights off/ get too drunk to care.

TooSeeI
2008-12-29, 17:39
fucking a chick with a hot body and bad face is way better than fapping. Just turn the lights off/ get too drunk to care.
While this may be true.
No matter how many people try and justify it this way: Having a good body is no excuse for fucking some one with an ugly face.

You are, in effect, just fucking an ugly chick. Well done, you fucking loser. How does the rest of society's scraps taste? God damn bottom feeders.
This still applies