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Emperor
2008-12-27, 04:41
I can't decide if I should put forth effort for the 3 months a year I'm home, or put forth effort while I'm at school the rest of the time.


I have a fling home, but am generally unhappy when I'm at school.. idk. I'm leaning more towards school. It sucks when you dump people, even though they don't do anything wrong.. you're just.. unhappy

what to do totse?

WritingANovel
2008-12-27, 04:42
Huh wut? You are a lil vague...more info is needed.

Emperor
2008-12-27, 04:48
Facts:
1. I go to college 9 hours away
2. I'm home about 3-4 months out of the year, the rest is spent at school. Sometimes less than that much, as I travel.
3. I have a lady-friend at home, which is fine and dandy when I'm here.
4. But - I'm unhappy with that situation when I'm away at school.
5. Yet I can't fathom dumping someone who doesn't do anything wrong...
6. Hypothetically, I could have flings at college and at home, but I'm not that type of guy.
7. I hate breaking hearts, but it might come to that.
8. If I break up with the girl at home now, I could probably hook up with other people at home - but that'd be a bloody mess eventually.


idk what to do. I don't want to dump someone who doesn't deserve it/is willing to deal with the long distance - however, I am not as willing, constantly feel bad about it, and am unhappy with the situation when I'm away.

Am I a complete jackass?

MartialShot
2008-12-27, 04:49
Facts:
1. I go to college 9 hours away
2. I'm home about 3-4 months out of the year, the rest is spent at school. Sometimes less than that much, as I travel.
3. I have a lady-friend at home, which is fine and dandy when I'm here.
4. But - I'm unhappy with that situation when I'm away at school.
5. Yet I can't fathom dumping someone who doesn't do anything wrong...
6. Hypothetically, I could have flings at college and at home, but I'm not that type of guy.
7. I hate breaking hearts, but it might come to that.
8. If I break up with the girl at home now, I could probably hook up with other people at home - but that'd be a bloody mess eventually.


idk what to do. I don't want to dump someone who doesn't deserve it/is willing to deal with the long distance - however, I am not as willing, constantly feel bad about it, and am unhappy with the situation when I'm away.

Am I a complete jackass?

Go for both duh...

WritingANovel
2008-12-27, 04:50
Can you get her to relocate for you?

Emperor
2008-12-27, 04:50
what happens if they find out about each other (rhetorical)


edit - no..


I hate how I sort of know the answer, but don't want to do it.. and I come to &T to find the solution. hah

MartialShot
2008-12-27, 04:52
what happens if they find out about each other (rhetorical)


edit - no..


I hate how I sort of know the answer, but don't want to do it.. and I come to &T to find the solution. hah

The solution is simple, what ever you get more sexual acts out of wins...tbh you need to be selfish in this situation

LSA King
2008-12-27, 06:07
Its your future man. Girlfriend back home or a future for you? Your choice nobody can make it for you or make it any easier, just prolong the situation.

Fanglekai
2008-12-27, 07:24
I can't decide if I should put forth effort for the 3 months a year I'm home, or put forth effort while I'm at school the rest of the time.


I have a fling home, but am generally unhappy when I'm at school.. idk. I'm leaning more towards school. It sucks when you dump people, even though they don't do anything wrong.. you're just.. unhappy

what to do totse?

She's a fling, not your girlfriend. Do whatever you want at school because you have no reason to be faithful to her. If she is your girlfriend, you should be faithful to her and learn how to type properly.

Malkog
2008-12-27, 08:51
Dump your girlfriend. You're not happy, why force that on her.

And what Fanglekai said about learning to type too.

psycho_8b
2008-12-27, 11:40
"I hate being away from you. I do. It breaks my heart. But school is important right now. I have to be able to put my full mind, body, effort and energy into it. I love you but I can't commit to you right now. You're always on my mind. I need to do this alone and get it done. I hope you understand that I do love you and I hate having to do this but I need to keep my head down. I want to be with you...I want to be able to come home with a degree, meet up with you, get a punch in the face from you for what I'm saying right now and end up hugging you and telling you that I still love you and that I want to put that degree towards something more for us. I'm sorry. I love you"

Change a few bits if you please but say basically this. You're then a hard worker who is looking towards the future...And you're the single guy who can fuck college chicks with her on standby (and she'll probably be fucking other dudes too. No guilt brother!)

Hope it helps and works for you mate. Long distances suck balls.

MartialShot
2008-12-27, 17:09
"I hate being away from you. I do. It breaks my heart. But school is important right now. I have to be able to put my full mind, body, effort and energy into it. I love you but I can't commit to you right now. You're always on my mind. I need to do this alone and get it done. I hope you understand that I do love you and I hate having to do this but I need to keep my head down. I want to be with you...I want to be able to come home with a degree, meet up with you, get a punch in the face from you for what I'm saying right now and end up hugging you and telling you that I still love you and that I want to put that degree towards something more for us. I'm sorry. I love you"

Change a few bits if you please but say basically this. You're then a hard worker who is looking towards the future...And you're the single guy who can fuck college chicks with her on standby (and she'll probably be fucking other dudes too. No guilt brother!)

Hope it helps and works for you mate. Long distances suck balls.

This man speaks the truth...Write what he said on a little piece of paper and say it to her....Problems solved

Zok
2008-12-27, 18:10
Relationships typically suffer when one party is told "move closer to me or this is over"

The way I see it is:
If you keep seeing her - regardless of whether she's done anything wrong, you're dissatisfied the majority of the time (because of the distance).

If you see someone who's more local to your school, you'll be happy for the majority of the time (despite feeling like a jerk for dumping her and despite being single for a few days/weeks).

I've been in the same situation that you're in right now - I think it was mutual when we decided to go for the second option.

Either way, you should talk to her about it and let her know what's on your mind. She might be having the exact same dilemma 9 hours away...