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View Full Version : If I Could Love You


skyclaw441
2008-11-29, 16:37
A really short poem, took me only two minutes to write. I'm not terribly good, but I thought I'd give it a shot.

If I could love you
How happy I'd be
I'd be forever blissful
And my heart wouldn't leave me

If I could love you
Would you love me too?
Would you be at my side?
And mine I'd call you

For I already love you
And now I'm asking you
Not just can I love you
Could you love me?


Meh... I know the fourth line is longer than the rest. Please don't attack me over how bad this is.

Moonius
2008-11-29, 23:05
<3

Also less repetition of the same word for maximization of interest rates. It's for aesthetic reasons.

Anarchist88
2008-11-30, 04:19
there are 2 things that make something art. (1) it is a self expression of the artist (2) it connects with the reader, and it does. no matter how bad you think it is, its still art. and its not that bad at all. there was a potential for much better rhyme scheme and a better flow, but oh well, one cant expect perfection.