This is a first attempt, about a girl who gave me reactive arthritis. (look it up if you're interested)

My body left broken and now diseased
Tossed aside despite what we’d shared
Did we only ever pretend that we cared?
Now you say you only want to be free’d?
I know for you it’s not a want, it’s a need
it would all be so perfect if only you dared,
Even whilst I’m bound to this damned chair
For me to be healed; only you hold the key
All that I need is you; you’re my drug
When the pain paralyses, I think of you,
and of all the memories that we keep.
I know you can’t leave with a nod and a shrug
Another like me, you will find very few
I’ll give you all time, but ‘til then I just weep

This is a first attempt, about a girl who gave me reactive arthritis. (look it up if you're interested)

My body left broken and now diseased
Tossed aside despite what we’d shared
Did we only ever pretend that we cared?
Now you say you only want to be free’d?
I know for you it’s not a want, it’s a need
it would all be so perfect if only you dared,
Even whilst I’m bound to this damned chair
For me to be healed; only you hold the key
All that I need is you; you’re my drug
When the pain paralyses, I think of you,
and of all the memories that we keep.
I know you can’t leave with a nod and a shrug
Another like me, you will find very few
I’ll give you all time, but ‘til then I just weep


i can seriously connect with this piece. this is exactly how I felt a few months after one of mi exes broke up with me (we are friends now). even now, 3 or 4 girls later, i still think about her at least once a day. you rhymed very well. it also flowed nicely. an impressive first attempt my fine sir. and dont worry, your memories of her will eventually stop being burdens. time heals all things.